• Sam Youngman

Sure, Democrats can suck but at least they’re not trying to kill us

By Sam Youngman

“I am not a member of any organized political party. I am a Democrat.” — Will Rogers

Anybody else feeling that right now?


Are you a Democrat who’s kinda pissed off at Democrats right now?


Print out pictures of Joe Manchin and Kyrsten Sinema to line the bottom of your toilet?


Um, no, me neither. Like what the hell? What kind of sicko would do some shit like that?


But I can definitely understand the first two. While the sausage is being made in Washington and lobbyists are getting to decide how much of what 81 million of us voted for actually gets to happen, it can be damn tempting to get out the pitchforks to go after the people we elected for not being tough enough or fighting hard enough or, in the cases of Manchin and Sinema, not being un-Mitch McConnell enough.


But hey, at least they’re not all trying to kill us.


And believe it or not, that is one major goddamn difference between the two parties right now — one of them is trying to govern and making a mess of doing it because it’s a messy process.


And the other party wants to fucking kill you.


Especially if you’re the planet, our democracy or just little Jimmy wanting to go to school. The GOP is like DeNiro’s Capone in Untouchables, just going down the list and wanting us all dead.


Oh Sam, stop exaggerating.


Ok, how about almost 700,000 dead Americans? How about comparing the policies and death tolls of California’s Democratic governor vs. the serial killers in Florida and Texas? How about Mitch McConnell and the entire Republican Party trying to kill 6 million jobs? How about the assholes in Texas who are basically trading guns for textbooks as they put bounties on women and doctors?


And how about the endless stream of bullshit from Fox News, embraced and amplified by the Republican Party, that has killed thousands, turned families against each other and taken a wrecking ball to the very foundations this nation is standing on?


This list of egregious and deadly sins doesn’t even include Republican opposition to fighting climate change or their blocking of the Violence Against Women Act or the ads that feature Marjorie Taylor Greene shooting a machine gun with such reckless mania that she hits herself in the face.


The point is, we’re up against actual murderers. This ain’t like politics used to be. There’s a much higher body count, and politicians are openly rooting for more death.


So yeah, Manchin and Sinema suck, and they could be somewhat credibly accused of helping Republicans maybe kinda sorta kill a bunch of us. But for the most part, we’re still the good guys.


Because even when we’re fucking things up, we are not intentionally trying to kill Americans or their jobs just to try and win elections.


And these days, only one party can say that and be telling the truth.